Happy 1st Birthday

I can't believe you are 1! One year ago, I was in a very different place. A place of sadness, uncertainty and always holding on with a glimmer of hope! In a few days is the anniversary of "the call" , the call we got about you...Baby boy, born Jan 17th, 8 pounds 4 ounces, healthy. Little did we know how our lives would change.

Bentley, you make your momma and daddy so very happy. You have taught us to smile, laugh, be silly and most important you have taught us unconditional love. Tonight we shall celebrate with pancakes (your favorite) and we will sing to you a million times--because my son, you have changed our world.

Happy Birthday B!


I would also like to say, please throw up a prayer for B's birthmom "L" as we are sure this is a hard day for her. How her loss can bring us so much joy is a part of adoption that is so hard to deal with and understand. We Love You "L"!!!

2010 in 5 pictures

So a little challenge from my husband, show 2010 in 5 pictures. We had an exceptional year and I found it hard to pick, however I believe I have gotten the ones that speak volumes.


The first time I held my son---I don't know if I will ever remember the true feelings I had, but when I look at this picture I have feelings of joy, disbelief and love.


I LOVE this picture. I wanted Cullen to be a daddy for so long and I was the one with the fertility issue so I would spend countless hours beating myself up, I was taking away his opportunity to be a dad. This picture fills my heart with joy to see him snuggling his son, his beautiful boy!


Part of wanting to have a family was to be able to experience all the things you love--together as a family. Cullen loves the aquarium and this picture shows my boys sharing the love of the aquarium together!


This is the face I have fallen in love with, this is the face I will do ANYTHING for. This face has taught me unconditional love!


The day we officially became a family, he took our last name and it was glorious.


As you know we have much to be thankful for and 2010 was an amazing year for us. Not only with Bentley but we have all been healthy, have a roof over our heads and jobs to go to. It has been a year to remember and we look forward to watching our little guy grow in 2011 and embrace whatever may come our way. I hope you have a great start to the New Year!

The Difference A Year Makes

I have done a lot of reflecting lately on how lonely we were last Christmas, how sad we were last Christmas and how we felt hopelessness last Christmas. Being a waiting couple is difficult, each and every day is difficult and then add the holidays and I am sorry but it is just too damn hard! I know many couples are waiting to build families, whether it is through fertility treatments, through adoption, through foster care and the list goes on....and the waiting is hard during the holidays. I know your pain, I know your heartache but I hope you find just an ounce or more of holiday cheer this season. You deserve it! Give yourself a break from the worry (easier said then done) and live in the moment. For someday, trust me, you will be reflecting on it too.

I am forever grateful that Bentley's birthmom selected us to be his parents. We are blessed beyond belief and we love him with all our heart. I can only imagine that she is also feeling all kinds of emotions this time of year, particularly as we approach his first birthday in less than a month. Please Lord be with "L" as she goes through the holidays, hold her for us and let her know how much we love her.

We look forward to celebrating but it is also important to recognize where you came from and encourage all those standing in our same shoes one short year ago! I pray that you will find peace this holiday season!

Bentley's First Santa Visit....

Or so we thought! After his visit we were a proud mommy and daddy. Bentley didn't cry, he was shy but didn't shed any tears. We even got him to smile after Santa rubbed his furry cuff on his nose! We told his grandma and grandpa about it and gave them their own copy of the photo (which is pretty cute if I must say) and they so kindly said, when we have been walking at the mall with Bentley we have him say Hi to Santa and Santa talks to him. So---for the 2nd, 3rd or maybe 4th time...Bentley didn't cry when he saw Santa :)

Merry Christmas!!

Hello....Is Anyone There?

Yikes, November must have been busy. It is almost over and the last post I did was November 8th. Tomorrow we welcome December and I can only imagine how quickly the time will go. Before I know it, we will be celebrating our babies 1st birthday! YIKES!!

Well, a lot has happened since my last post. Bentley is no longer slow and steady in the crawling department. He is fast, furious, curious and persistent. He pulls himself up on everything, he stands all alone for many seconds at a time, he cruises but he doesn't realize he can't just fling himself forward or backward when he wants to go somewhere. We have been lucky and have been able to catch him on most occurrences but I fear someday he will take a big spill. I guess that is part of it all.

He had a nasty virus last week and it was horrible to see him sick. It was 3-4 days of high temps and a sad and sick little guy. He was feeling better by Thanksgiving--thankfully :)

I will post some Thanksgiving pictures soon....this year we have so much to be thankful for and we all commented on how our lives have changed so much in just one year. We can't wait to continue to celebrate the holidays and will enjoy every minute of it, it is what we have been waiting for...for many, many years!!!!

Slow and Steady.....

....wins the race...right?

Well, we have a crawler folks! He moves fairly slow and I am thankful for that! It is amazing how one milestone makes such a difference. He seems so big, he doesn't seem like a baby anymore. I can see him spot something and then he moves....not fast...but he moves and he explores! Oh my---we are in trouble when he can move fast! Watch out cats---he is MOBILE!!!!

Ahoy Matey!

Our little pirate did pretty good last night for his first Halloween!

The cousins that still dress up:




As promised a couple 9 month pictures---seriously, this babe is getting too big!